Cutter Slagle

  • About
  • Books
  • Contact
  • Subscribe
You are here: Home / Advice / What’s Size Got to Do with It?

What’s Size Got to Do with It?

February 20, 2020 By Cutter Slagle 1 Comment

It’s interesting—to me, at least—that I’ve been writing for about one hundred years now, and still have not discussed topics that are common in the gay community.

Or aged . . . I haven’t seemed to age in one hundred years, either. Thank you very much.

That’s not completely true.

I’ve been writing since I was twelve. Back then, my content focused on murder and mayhem. Still does. Recently, I finished Bury What Remains, my latest psychological suspense manuscript, and lots of murder and mayhem ensue. Side note: If you’re an agent looking for a new author to represent, allow me to take a moment to say, “Heeeey!”

Yet, it wasn’t until much later in my career, about four years ago and right around the release of my second crime fiction novel, ‘Til Death (which I assume all of you are familiar with), that I began delving into LGBTQA+ subjects and themes with my Rage column.

Since then, I’ve expressed thoughts and feelings on the ugliness of dating, bisexuality, partners who are too active on social media, etcetera, etcetera. Ad nauseam. Yet, there’s been one teeny tiny (or, depending on who you’ve been acquainted with, not so teeny tiny) issue I’ve shied away from until now. Are you ready for it?

The size of a man’s . . . feet. Because, as some believe, feet size is everything! Without a good pair of feet, how do you expect to walk properly?

If you think about it, it’s kind of ridiculous the amount of attention we put on this body part. The feet, I mean. It’s also significant to mention that straight women are not exempt from the conversation. After all, straight women want a decent-sized pair of feet, too.

It goes without saying (you know sure-as-shit I’m going to say it anyway, though) that we do not get to pick our feet size. Whether we’re blessed with small, medium, large, or magnum-sized feet, we all have to live with what we’re given. And, yes, regardless of length and width, it can sometimes be hard to find a pair of shoes that fit.

I know someone (fine, it was me) who once invited a friend over for a playdate. When that friend got to my apartment and took off his shoes, I immediately said, “Call an Uber and get those feet out of here before they hurt someone!”

On the flip side, I know an individual (yeah, still me) who had to promptly leave a social gathering because the host had Ken doll-sized feet.

What can I say? Shoe shopping is hard!

But, I wholeheartedly stand by what I said earlier: We do not get to pick our feet size. Therefore, are we going to simply throw someone away just because their feet are too small or too big? Who are we? Goldicocks? Oops—typo! I meant Goldilocks.

Think about it: Say you meet someone, and they’re perfect. Well, as perfect as someone can be. In this climate, perfection probably looks like having a job and voting for anyone other than Donald Trump. But, I digress.

So, you meet this perfect, job-having, non-Trump-voting person, and the two of you really hit it off. Maybe he makes you laugh, owns a publishing company, has Sarah Jessica Parker’s cell phone number to share with you.

Before long slash probably the same day you met, it’s time to shoe shop. Now, where this man has shoe shopped in the past is not part of this particular discussion. However, for your sake, let’s just hope it was at Christian Louboutin and not Payless. Am I right?

When those shoes finally come off, you may discover feet that you’re not initially happy with, and as a result, want to make up an excuse to run away and never look back. Yep, me again.

Is this fair, though? Is it rationale? By doing this, are we ultimately doing ourselves a disservice? How important is feet size, anyway? And, is feet size more important than personality, sense of humor, kindness, or patience?

For some, maybe so. That doesn’t make them wrong, per se, only proves that everyone is different. As such, everyone has their own list of priorities and qualifications when looking for a partner.

But, by being closed-minded (and not just when it comes to shoe shopping), we could be limiting ourselves. Dare I even say, setting ourselves up for failure. Today, closed-mindedness is a disease. While it may not exactly rival the Coronavirus, it is still damaging and deadly.

Why do we continue to allow ourselves to be so closed-minded, then? We very much do it to ourselves, even though we have the full ability to stop. That’s right, boys and girls: closed-mindedness is a disease, but it’s a curable disease. What’s the antidote for it? Stop being so fucking small-minded.

You’re welcome.

Look, I’m not saying go against everything you believe in, or sacrifice everything you want in life. We all have—should have, at least—a list of values or standards that we’re not willing to budge on when it comes to deciding who to share our lives with, be it with a partner, friend, even blood relative. However, the list should be small and not necessarily written in stone.

While it’s cliché, it’s still true: If we’re so focused on what we think we want and need, then we stand the chance of missing out on something better and more fabulous.

My advice is to not knock it until you try it. Small feet, big feet, plaid, pineapple on pizza, a Cutter Slagle novel (how’d that get there?) . . . Be willing to give the unknown a fair opportunity.

Once you do, and you determine you don’t like it or it’s not really for you—whatever “it” may be—don’t judge or belittle or shame anyone else for enjoying it. Remember, not everyone is the same. You may feel a certain way about something, but that doesn’t automatically make you or your way right.

It’s not about understanding; it’s about respecting. I personally don’t understand why a person would rather watch the movie instead of reading the book, but I respect that the choice is theirs to make. It’s a right, a preference. Just because I have a different way of doing things doesn’t make my way better or more correct.

Another thing, too: It’s perfectly okay. I’m not going to die or lose any sleep over the fact that someone doesn’t like to read. It’s not as if books are going to be sacrificed or I’m never going to be able to read again simply because someone else doesn’t find pleasure in the activity.

You can substitute books and reading for just about anything: feet size, Adam Sandler movies, gay marriage. You may not understand gay marriage—and that’s fine—but you should respect an individual’s choice and right to marry someone of the same sex.

If you can’t respect those who have contrasting feelings or opinions of what you may have, then at least learn to keep your fucking pie hole shut. Seems pretty straight forward, don’t you think?

Unless we’re talking about Britney Spears.

If you don’t like Britney, then there is no help for you . . . And may you burn in hell.

I kid!

Well, kind of.

Filed Under: Advice Tagged With: LGBTQ blog, LGBTQ tips, LGBTQ writer, LGBTQ writing, The Male Carrie Bradshaw

Comments

  1. Lee Ann smith says

    February 21, 2020 at 5:53 am

    Love this blog! Spot on!

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

sincerelycutter

View

Apr 7

Open
“He told her sometimes people did the wrong thing for the right reason.” — @chriswhitakerauthor 

This novel will break your heart—and it’s completely worth it. 😭💔

sincerelycutter

View

Mar 19

Open
“Never let anyone make you feel ordinary.”

sincerelycutter

View

Feb 9

Open
“When I decided to leave was when I learned and accepted that I can’t change people, I can’t save people, only love them. I can only change myself and my circumstances.” — @pamelaanderson

sincerelycutter

View

Feb 6

Open
#NewBlogAlert 🚨#LinkInBio or cutterslagle.com 🧑🏼‍💻 #TheMaleCarrieBradshaw 
▪️
Boundaries are important, and for all types of relationships, including the relationship you have with your mom, your partner, your best friend, and your favorite pizza delivery guy.
▪️
While exploring the idea of boundaries, I couldn’t help but think about a past fling of mine, Peter Rabbit. Peter Rabbit and I only saw each other for a couple of months. Our first date was classic: dinner, drinks, dancing, dick down. In that order. Oh, to be back in my twenties. Kidding! I’m extremely happy to have outgrown some behaviors of my youth.
Follow on Instagram
This error message is only visible to WordPress admins
Error: Access Token is not valid or has expired. Feed will not update.
No feed found with the ID 1. Go to the All Feeds page and select an ID from an existing feed.

Writer: Cutter Slagle

5 days ago

Writer: Cutter Slagle
“My greatest beauty secret is being happy with myself. I don’t use special creams or treatments—I’ll use a little bit of everything. It’s a mistake to think you are what you put on yourself. I believe that a lot of how you look is to do with how you feel about yourself and your life. Happiness is the greatest beauty secret.” —Tina Turner ... See MoreSee Less
View on Facebook
· Share

Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on Linked In Share by Email

Writer: Cutter Slagle

5 days ago

Writer: Cutter Slagle
Nothing says SUMMER like a new Nora novel! ☀️📚💙 Nora Roberts ... See MoreSee Less

Photo

View on Facebook
· Share

Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on Linked In Share by Email

Writer: Cutter Slagle

1 week ago

Writer: Cutter Slagle
“So many new things to begin that the idea of looking back on anything seemed unappealing and remote.” —Alison Gaylin, If I Die Tonight ... See MoreSee Less

Photo

View on Facebook
· Share

Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on Linked In Share by Email

Writer: Cutter Slagle

3 months ago

Writer: Cutter Slagle
“ ‘I do enjoy my life,’ Steve said. ‘And my work. Maybe problems arise when you’re just too focused on the results. The joy is in the process, the trying. The pursuit.’ “ —Catherine Ryan Howard, Run Time#MondayMotivate ... See MoreSee Less

Photo

View on Facebook
· Share

Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on Linked In Share by Email

Writer: Cutter Slagle

3 months ago

Writer: Cutter Slagle
“There are so many questions that have no answers. Acceptance of these mysteries is the only way to peace.” —Lisa Unger, The Stranger Inside ... See MoreSee Less

Photo

View on Facebook
· Share

Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on Linked In Share by Email

Popular Posts

Sex Sells . . . Your Self-Respect

Putting The Cock In Cocky

What Are You Addicted To?

© Copyright 2019 Cutter Slagle · All Rights Reserved · Powered by WordPress · Admin

Copyright © 2023 · Simply Pro on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in